hello out there...
just wanted to post something different for today..
i usually post poetry based on what i felt or made up stories of people i know...or dont know..
well how should i start this... im still thinking ahehe.. sorry.. well just got the courage to write something that is about me...
for starters.. paquita is not really my name .. just something i wanted to be called .
paquita goddess of sexiness haha.. but im a man.. not gay!! i wanna be clear on that issue..not that there is anything wrong with gay people or being gay...
i wanted the name paquita ..in the philippines i watched a very old movie starring dolphy and only i remembered the name he said on the film...
anyway getting back on the reason why i wanted to post this....
i hurt someone i love.. not once not twice but i think 5 times...
yesterday i wanted to mellow out our very very hot "relationship". we havent really seen each other in person but we felt like we were married .. so open with each other while talkin...
you get the point i hope...
i think about 2 weeks ago i confessed on why i always dissapear the last 4 times...
she accepted that .."cryin is i think hot wired in her brain" she cries alot.. but lately almost all the reasons were about me....
yeah i leave her and i dont even say goodbye and i just pop up again..
she just welcomes me back each time....
but this time i said goodbye for now... intending on coming back after doin things ..
things that would fix something in mah past...
she says.. you can fix that while we still talk .. why do you have to leave me?...
lots of reasons.. one reason.... you still have one year to think of what your getting into...
ive learned from my past... dont let emotions make decisions for you....
love then for me was an experience... never felt anything like it before...
that feeling of giving it all ..
something happened and after that we recented each other soo much....
its like we didnt really know each other...
til today still im regreting that day..
only 3 months into that relationship we were soo deep in the feeling of love that
nothing else mattered....as if we were destined together...
something happened ...and we said goodbye .. with anger...we parted...
now i feel i cant trust this thing that is ticking inside me
giving me signals that could the death of me
its a happy feeling i wont lie
but im afraid of it since the last time
giving me sweet emotions
giving me warm smiles
i wont be fooled anymore
i know how this goes
ill be dragged into this
feeling of needing and wanting
and its not only me that is goin to be the victim
a gurl will also fall for this feelin
and we both hope that we wont fall
coz falling into is certain doom
they call it love but its death for both of us...
wait wait.. dont read the poem above... thats just somebody who is afraid to love....
well ok im that one who is afraid of this love....
well not afraid to love but afraid love might find out
i still have a secret that i cannot devulge
so i must put a stop to this
heart is already hurt so many times..
one final tear to shed to say goodbye
one final farewell to your heart that loves soo much...
OMG!!! what are you talkin about???
huh? me?
yes you!!!
i dont know im just passin thru...
then who wrote those things above?
i think its that guy over there...
ok tnx ill talk to this person ...
hey....
who me?
yes... are you the person who wrote those things above?
hmmm it depends...
depends on what?
depends if somebody out there trust me enough and let me fix my past....
well ok..... but hurry it up man...
ok!!!
